The Parallels Between CrossFit and The Therapy Process
Oftentimes, I view the process of the therapy process, similar to my journey in becoming a CrossFit athlete.
I can remember the first day I walked into CrossFit. I had hit a place in my life where I was ready to make some changes, and begin to commit to a consistent practice of taking care of my body. I had read of the benefits of exercise on overall mental health and was ready to see what it was about.
Many times, those first steps into the therapy office are quite similar. You might have read or heard about therapy, but it feels unknown. It’s such an exciting moment to welcome clients into the office, and invite them to take care of themselves. Sometimes, little do they know their life is about to change. Life is about to to take on a whole new meaning, and they are about to experience things with greater curiosity, wonder and flexibility.
The first day at CrossFit was unfamiliar. I stood on the outside just watching the athletes, trying to build up the courage to put on my sneakers. My coach James could tell I had never done something like this before. I recall the risk of wanting to get out there, outweighing my fear of looking like I didn’t know what I was doing. It took humility and being vulnerable.
Every time I lifted the weights, James said good job. Getting out of self-judgement and no longer thinking of things as good and bad was a wonderful feeling. I didn’t have the time to waste after each movement, judging whether what I did was good or bad, because we had already moved on. Moving on and not overthinking my performance, was exactly what I needed.
As I saw each athlete lifting and I began to wonder if their love for weightlifting had nothing to do with the lift, but moreover, this deep desire to conquer something, to triumph over any internal blocks, and maybe, for once, feel victorious in life. I hadn’t felt victorious in many aspects of my life, and CrossFit allowed me to find this sense of victory that was indescribable.
I kept wanting to come back to CrossFit because I wanted more than anything to feel alive, and each time I went, I felt that way. It felt so great having the support of other athletes and experiencing their praise. I felt seen and supported in my struggle each time, guaranteed. While the other athletes didn’t know it, they were supporting ALL of me throughout the workout. Their recognition wasn’t about the exercise. Their cheering was helping me become stronger in my professional goals, romantic life, health, and any other fears I had. We should all feel seen and supported in our struggles in life, but sadly, so often we struggle alone privately.
As I fought through those deeper parts of myself, I began to get to know others and hear about their struggles and stressors. Each time I cheered them on, there was this unspoken feeling I was helping them triumph over anything their heart desired, and more often than not, it wasn’t even about the personal record (PR) in the weightlifting. It was about their professional life, health, family, marriage, dreams, aging parents, you name it.
There is way more to CrossFit than what meets the eye. Way more.
Each workout you will lose yourself and find yourself over and over again, until there is no self, there is just this peace and the whole world stops for a moment. For me, that moment is where I feel God. It truly is the most gratifying altered state of consciousness one can achieve. To be defeated, is to discover and to grow. If you can conquer a CrossFit workout, you can conquer anything. I wish for you to struggle, and while that isn’t the greatest wish to put on someone, I know firsthand how it will transform you.
One of the goals in therapy is to begin to experience yourself and life in a similar way. You begin to see experiences with greater flexibility and curiosity. It’s a wonderful place to sit in, when your mind becomes more open and neutral to life’s experiences.
Walking into CrossFit required a tremendous amount of humility and vulnerability, and so does walking into a therapist’s office. Each therapy session you start to peel back more of yourself, and find new ways of relating to yourself and those around you. The hope is that you find this peace through the process, as everything slows down for a moment. You begin to have more space to think and feel.
Sometimes in a CrossFit workout I have a little more to give the workout, and other times it’s more important to meet myself with kindness and pull back. I learned that how I moved my mind each workout, resulted in how my body followed. As I began to focus on keeping my mind positive, my body began to follow. Each workout I try to notice where my thoughts are more than anything.
Through therapy, I will help you move your mind, so that you can move through life with greater ease and joy. In order to move your mind, you need to move your body, and in order to move your body, you need move your mind. There is no way around it. Sitting on a couch expecting to grow doesn’t create the monumental breakthroughs of confidence that exercise can. When you move, your brain generates thought and opportunity.
In therapy, you might want my help developing strategies to move closer to your life goals, or you might want help pulling back to create a more well-rounded life. Whatever you’re looking for, I can help you get there.
In becoming more open and neutral with yourself, I hope that you begin to really like who you are. I hope that you learn what it means to practice radical acceptance. There is no good or bad in life, sometimes things are just what they are. Getting out of labeling things as good or bad can allow you more space to treat yourself with flexibility and with compassion.
I leave my CrossFit gym every day, glad that my body can do what it can do. Sometimes I wish people could see CrossFit has moved my spirit, but then I realize how deeply personal the process has been. Frankly, only I will ever need to know that. The confidence CrossFit has given me brings me to tears.
Leaving Crossfit feeling defeated emotionally isn’t an option for me, and I hope it isn’t for you. Leaving physically defeated is non-negotiable. If your open to exposing yourself to tolerable levels of stress with the support of others, than CrossFit is for you, better yet, life is for you, because isn’t that so much what life is about?
Therapy is similar, in that I hope you leave feeling glad you took care of yourself. The experiences you might have internally might not be visible in other people’s eyes, and honestly, not everyone has the right to that process. It might become less of a luxury, and more of a necessity to take care of your mental health.
If you are open to beginning to listen to your heart with the support of a therapist as your guide, I invite you to begin this transformative journey.
As time passed in CrossFit I no longer needed my coach James in the same way. His voice had become my own. It was internalized. I knew just what he would say each moment. He always helped me find that fine line between pushing myself slightly further, or needing to know it was time to pull back.
A therapist can help you in a similar way. A therapist’s kindness, encouragement and patience can become your own. And someday, you won’t need them as much anymore.
While my lift oftentimes looks different from others in the gym, sometimes drastically different, I’ve realized that’s what makes me, me (lol). That’s really what’s not important in the end, because the way I feel inside is immeasurable. The greatest things in life aren’t always seen with the eyes, but felt with the heart. Sometimes what isn’t visible to others in life, is what’s most beautiful.
