How to find a teen therapist in Orange County?
Once you know its time to get your teen help, its usually later than you would have hoped for. Perhaps you’ve thought for a while about therapy, but felt uncertain about moving forward. Here are some things to look for, that indicate it might be time to get your teen help:
1. Their emotions are more dysregulated than usual. Granted this is part of being a teen, but if their emotions are more frequent, intense and unresolved, they could benefit from support. Most teens don’t have the life experience to have a “reflective capacity.” One of my favorite things to do in therapy, is to help teens think about what they are feeling. Helping them have the ability to reflect, can assist them in better understanding themselves, and in turn, help others understand them.
2. Your teens emotions have impacted their activities of daily living. They are no longer participating in life in the way they used to. On a given day, it is challenging to get through school, a social event, or family interactions.
Once you’ve decided to pursue finding a therapist for your teen, it might take some time. It’s best to meet with various providers and make sure you have the right fit. The following are some questions and answers to ask, to simplify the process.
1. Why do you like working with teens? Look for excitement and enthusiasm here. Also look for compassion, honesty and perhaps humor around this developmental phase.
2. What’s your overall philosophy on what you’re seeing with teen mental health currently and how do you go about addressing it? Look for someone that understands things from a developmental perspective. The capacity to understand and manage emotion is very difficult as a teenager. However, one concern, is that this generation is very attached to, and heavily identified with “challenge”. Teens report the only way they can get a response from peers is to discuss how much they are struggling. Basic interest and emotional validation are hard to find among their peers. This is why group therapy can be an excellent avenue for support. It is important you find a therapist that can assist your teen in discovering despite how hard things, there is hope and ways to make sense of their journey.
3. How will you work with my need to be involved as a parent? I work from a family systems perspective. Oftentimes, in between sessions, parents will have updates of things they see at home that they want the therapist to be aware of. The most ideal and healthy way to deal with this, is to discuss these things with your teen, and encourage them to bring it into the session. Respecting how your teen uses their time in session is important. Additionally, trusting your teens ability to solve problems on their own, is developmentally appropriate. Your concern about the level of involvement to have, deserves respect and attention, as well. If you have concerns that involve communication between you and your teen, you will benefit from booking a session with your teen, or seeking parent support. Being able to think with your teen’s therapists on ways to guide them, and the level of involvement to have with them is important. Be sure your teen’s therapist is open to this.
4. How is the first appointment set up? Look for an intake where both parent(s) are requested to attend. Having the perspective of both parent(s) is key to understanding the family dynamics and foundational relational experiences. Depending on the way the clinician works, I think it can be helpful at the end of a meeting like this, for everyone to be in the room to think about the goals of treatment. Remember, your teen still needs you involved in their life, just in a different way.
5. What’s the overarching goal for therapy for teenagers at this developmental juncture? Look for a clinician that prioritizes identity formation through feelings recognition, regulation and relational attunement. Aim to find someone that can translate the skill your teen is learning now, to how it will benefit them as an adult.
6. What do you wish clients knew about working with you before they started? Therapy is a co-created experience where we will think deeply about your internal experience. I am aware that all of us can be guarded and defended around going deeper with our feelings. I will respect that, and develop a pace with you around that. The type of conversations will probably feel different, than with other people you have in your life. It’s important you communicate with me, your needs and wants in session, so that I can assist in caring for you as best as possible.
I’d love the opportunity to meet with your family to discuss how I can be of help. To book a 15 minute complementary consultation on zoom, please email me at hello@brittanyfella.com. I look forward to connecting with you.
